Between The Matches

After Ryan, I decided to give Facebook Dating a try.

And what an experience that turned out to be.

Not long after joining, I matched with a guy we’ll call Joe. Joe lived in Connecticut at the time but was planning to move closer to my area within the next few months. We started talking regularly, and our conversations flowed easily. He was 36, worked in medical sales, had a dog, and seemed to have his life together. Most importantly, he seemed mature. After some of the experiences I’d already had, that felt refreshing.

We talked for a little while before deciding to meet in person. I was genuinely excited.

When the day finally arrived, I was a little thrown off. He looked older than I expected. Not dramatically older than his photos, but enough that I wasn’t immediately sure whether I was attracted to him. The conversation was a little awkward at first too. Nothing terrible, just the normal discomfort of two strangers trying to figure each other out.

As the night went on, though, things improved. Joe had pale skin, blue eyes, and light hair that was starting to thin a little. Objectively, he wasn’t exactly the type of guy I usually pictured myself with. But attraction is funny. Sometimes it grows. The more we talked, the more I found myself liking him.

By the end of the night, he walked me back to my car and we hugged goodbye. I wasn’t ready to kiss him yet, but I left feeling optimistic. More importantly, I wanted to see him again.

While I was talking to Joe, I was still active on the dating apps. Which led to a small problem: I matched with another Joe.

To avoid confusion, we’ll call him Joe #2.

From the beginning, talking to Joe #2 felt effortless. I was honestly shocked by how much we had in common. He was funny, charismatic, down-to-earth, and incredibly easy to talk to. On top of that, he was divorced, which made me feel like he understood a part of my life that most people couldn’t fully relate to.

Naturally, that should have been my first red flag. Nobody is ever as perfect as they seem through text messages.

At the time, though, I wasn’t thinking about that. I was just excited.

Our first date was at a restaurant halfway between where we lived. When I arrived, he greeted me with a hug and we headed inside. The restaurant ended up being much nicer than either of us expected, and we spent the next few hours talking.

I wouldn’t say the date was perfect. There were no fireworks or movie-worthy moments. But it was good. Really good. The kind of date that leaves you looking forward to the next one.

At this point, I found myself in an interesting position.

Joe #1 was steady, mature, and kind. But he was also a little distant. Our schedules rarely lined up, and because of the distance, we weren’t seeing each other nearly as often as I would have liked. Still, every interaction left me wanting to learn more about him.

Joe #2 was the complete opposite. Conversation came effortlessly, we seemed to have endless things in common, and there was an undeniable excitement every time we talked. Even if he was a little talkative.

For the first time since Chris and Jack, I found myself genuinely interested in getting to know more than one person again. The difference was that this time, I wasn’t panicking about it. I wasn’t overthinking every text message or trying to decide someone’s future after a single date.

I was simply enjoying getting to know both of them.

And honestly, that felt like progress.