By this point, we were somewhere between Thanksgiving and Christmas, and life felt wonderfully full.
Most of my free time was spent with family. Between helping with my new nephew, shopping for Christmas gifts, planning for all the holiday season gatherings, and squeezing in time for work and friends, the weeks seemed to fly by.
Amid all of that, Matt and I settled into a comfortable routine.
We usually saw each other about once a week, and more often than not, he came to my apartment since he was living with his parents and siblings. There was something easy about our time together. It never felt forced or overly planned—we just enjoyed each other’s company.
After finishing The White Lotus, he introduced me to another world I hadn’t previously been interested in: the Marvel movies. I had never seen any of them.
Much to my surprise, he was right again. I loved them.
I started to notice a pattern. Matt had a knack for suggesting things I probably wouldn’t have picked for myself, and more often than not, I ended up genuinely enjoying them. It was fun to experience something new through someone else’s eyes.
We also shared enough common interests that spending time together felt natural. Conversation came easily, and there was never pressure to entertain each other.
Sometimes he stayed the night, and one morning we woke up to a snowy morning.
Before I could finish getting ready, he was outside brushing off my car so we could head down the street for breakfast while we waited for the roads to improve.
It was a small gesture, but again he reminded me how great a guy he was.
As the holidays approached, I found myself reflecting on how much my outlook on dating had changed.
For the first time in years, I wasn’t in a hurry to define a relationship or rush toward the next milestone. I was perfectly content seeing someone when our schedules aligned and focusing on the rest of my life when they didn’t.
There was no pressure.
No countdown.
No feeling that every date had to lead somewhere immediately.
In fact, I had started to wonder whether I even wanted to jump into a serious relationship right then.
That realization surprised me.
Not because I was closed off to the idea of finding love, but because I finally understood that my happiness didn’t depend on it.
I could enjoy getting to know someone without needing to know exactly where it was headed.
And if things didn’t work out, I would be okay.
I also realized something else about myself: dating more than one person at a time just wasn’t for me.
I’d tried it, learned from it, and ultimately discovered that I preferred investing my energy in one connection at a time. It allowed me to be more present, more honest with myself, and less distracted by comparisons.
Whether Matt and I would ultimately work out was still an open question.
But for the first time since downloading Hinge, I wasn’t fixated on finding the answer.
I was simply enjoying the season I was in.
And in many ways, that felt like finding my stride.
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