As promised, I haven’t returned to the dating apps.
That doesn’t mean I haven’t put myself out there.
A few weeks ago, I gave my number to a stranger.
I was down at my parents’ shore house for the weekend and we were out getting a drink before dinner. At one point, I went up to the bar to grab another drink.
The place was packed.
I spotted a small opening where two guys were standing and figured it was my best chance of getting close enough to order.
“Hey, do you mind if I squeeze in here?” I asked.
“Of course,” one of them said in a goofy voice. I smiled.
Let’s call them Kevin and Colin.
Kevin had long hair and was probably around my height. Colin was much taller and immediately caught my attention.
We chatted while I waited for my drinks, and then I headed back to my parents.
“The tall one is cute,” my mom said almost immediately.
I laughed.
Over the last year, my mom has become one of my biggest supporters through all of this. She’s listened to every story, celebrated the good dates, rolled her eyes through the bad ones, and never once told me to give up.
It’s nice having someone so firmly in your corner.
A few minutes later, Kevin got up to go to the bathroom.
My mom noticed before I did.
“The tall one is standing there by himself,” she said. “Go give him your number.”
I looked at my dad.
“What about Dad?”
“I’ll handle him,” she replied. “You go.”
So I did.
My heart was pounding as I walked back over.
“Hey,” I said. “I was wondering if you wanted my number. I’m down here a lot during the summer and figured maybe we could go out sometime.”
For someone who isn’t naturally outgoing, it felt surprisingly bold.
Colin smiled.
“Of course,” he said, handing me his phone.
I typed in my number and walked away feeling oddly proud of myself.
Later that night, he texted me.
We talked for a while, but when he suggested I come over, that was an easy no from me.
We added each other on Instagram and eventually the conversation fizzled out.
For a little while, I didn’t hear much from him.
A couple of weekends later, Colin reached out on Instagram and asked if I was around.
I wasn’t available that weekend, but I told him I would be the following one.
We switched back to texting and made tentative plans.
Then, once again, we barely talked.
The following Friday, I was out at happy hour with some new friends at the same bar where we had originally met.
Toward the end of the night, I looked across the room and spotted Colin and Kevin.
Almost at the same time, Colin texted me a picture of the bar.
I laughed and walked over.
What started as a quick hello turned into more than an hour of conversation.
Eventually my friends headed home, but I wasn’t ready to leave yet.
I ended up taking an Uber with Colin and Kevin to another bar nearby.
Kevin was hilarious. Charming, funny, and a little ridiculous in the best way.
Colin was quieter. Still funny and outgoing, but more reserved.
We seemed to have more in common, and I found myself enjoying the conversation more and more as the night went on.
We stayed out far too late talking.
I’ll admit I don’t remember every detail of the evening, but I remember having a genuinely great time.
At one point, I mentioned wondering whether Kevin liked me.
Colin laughed and assured me that Kevin had said nothing but nice things about me all night and was encouraging Colin to pursue me.
For some reason, that made me smile.
I also learned that Colin had been engaged the year before.
I didn’t ask many questions, but hearing that made me wonder if he understood some of what I had been through.
The next day, we already had plans to meet up again.
This time, I brought my sister and brother-in-law along to the bar where Colin and Kevin were hanging out.
My sister made an observation that stuck with me.
“He’s the complete opposite of your ex-husband.” And she wasn’t wrong.
Colin was singing along to songs, dancing with people, laughing loudly, and genuinely enjoying himself.
There wasn’t a judgmental bone in his body. It was refreshing to watch.
We had another fun night together.
The truth is, though, I still don’t know all that much about him.
We really only talk when we’re making plans to see each other, or when we are together at a bar.
We haven’t had the long conversations that reveal who someone really is.
We’re still very much in the early chapters.
At one point that night—likely helped along by a few drinks and the energy of the bar—Colin told me I checked all of his boxes.
He even claimed Kevin had told him not to mess things up.
A year ago, those words would have meant everything to me. I would have replayed them over and over in my head. I would have let myself get carried away imagining what it all meant.
But a year of dating taught me something important.
Words are easy.
Consistency matters. Effort matters. Time matters.
People reveal who they are through actions, not promises.
So while I appreciated hearing it, I didn’t let myself build a future around a sentence.
Since then, we haven’t talked much.
Part of me suspects this is exactly what it looks like: a fun summer fling.
We don’t live particularly close to each other outside of the shore, and I don’t have any grand expectations.
And honestly, that’s okay.
Because for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel like I need every story to become something more.
Sometimes it’s enough to enjoy a moment for what it is.
Still, summer has always felt a little magical.
And who knows? Maybe this story has another chapter left.
Only time will tell.
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